The weekend was a success!

We  got the nursery ready this weekend.  I say we, but honestly I can take NO credit for it.  All of the work was done by Chad, Eric, and Megan.  They did a great job but you'll just have to take my word for it for the time being.  I took some pictures but when I inserted the SD card from the camera it wanted me to format it, and though I denied it, I still couldn't access the 60 or so pictures from the last couple of weeks on it.  I'm going to try and access the pictures using the cord from the camera (if I can find it) or use the printer.

So for now, you'll have to take my word for it that the room looks awesome.  Chad also put the crib together last night and it is more beautiful than I could have imagined, too.  It is way more sturdy and solid than the crib we used for the boys but it actually ended up costing about the same with the 25% coupon we got for trading in the much worn and chewed on older crib.  I'm so pleased with it.

The house is still in disarray because of all of the stuff out of the nursery but I think that in the next few weeks we'll be able to wrap those things up and here soon our house will finally be homey again!  I can't wait!

Busy weekend ahead!

We have a busy weekend ahead and I couldn't be more excited!  Today I'm working on getting the house cleaned up a little and finally finishing up on emptying the nursery (formerly playroom).  This weekend we are going to get our paint on!  My brother-in-law and sister-in-law are coming up here to help us with the painting and I'm really looking forward to it!  It's not very often that anyone can make it over this way.  Their son is a few months younger than L and the boys both love playing with him.  When Chad and his brother they can get pretty goofy and I think we are going to have a lot of fun on Sunday.  The little boys and the big boys are all sure to have tons of fun.  Megan and I will be having plenty of fun ourselves.  She is a super organizer and I'm hopeful she can give me some suggestions on all of our stuff and of course we will oooh and awww over all the fun little girl stuff, too.

Aside from all of the fun, we are also going to succeed in getting the nursery ready for the crib and some personal touches.  I'm looking forward to having a little sanctuary to escape to when things get a little too much for me, as is prone to happen the later in pregnancy I get.  Even though she won't be sleeping in there right away, it will be a nice place for us to escape to for feedings, too.  Also, we are having a family shower next weekend, thanks to Megan, and we need to have a good place to put everything, too.

I'm so stinking excited!!  I will post pictures when we have everything put together and ready.  I can't wait!

Results are IN!!

We got the results back at 6 pm last night.  It was good news!  The titers are low enough that there shouldn't be any problem for Emeline, now or after she is born.  Such a relief.  Though I had every confidence in the procedures that she might have to endure, I want to be able to room in with her at the hospital, leave at the same time, and be able to have a good start to the nursing relationship.  Those were things that I was willing to give up for her health and safety but certainly not something I was looking forward to living without.  Now it looks like we won't have to!

I love spring!

The weather around here is beautiful and should be throughout the rest of the week!  We're talking highs in the low 80s and lows in the 50s and 60s.  It just doesn't get any better than that.  To top it all off, over the weekend we got an inch and a half of rain.  My daffodils are in full bloom and the windows are open letting in all that wonderful fresh air.  Nothing improves my mood and outlook like open window weather.

Of course, we still don't know anything about my lab results.  I did call this morning and they are in but the doctor wasn't there yet and he has to look over them before they will release them.  I'm just happy to know they are finally in and that I'll be finding something out this afternoon.  My stress levels around this have been steadily going down since I first found out more information on Thursday.  Of course, the uncertainty of what interventions we may be needing and if she'll be joining us a little earlier than expected still weighs on me some.  Most of that is because we still are SO far from being ready.  Right now, we don't even have a bed to bring her home to.  Well, we have it but the crib is un-assembled in the garage for now.  We are borrowing my sister-in-law's pack n' play with bassinet for rooming-in the first couple of months and we probably won't pick it up until next weekend.  I do have the car seat ready to put in the car and plan on installing it in the next few days.  I have installed our seats extra early with the boys, too.  I'm just a preparer like that.

I plan to have an update later this evening about what the blood work shows.  Cross your fingers for only the one antibody and titers lower than 1:16!

I posted a few of my questions and concerns in an online forum about this condition and the ladies reassured me that this actually an involved test and the results normally do take 5 to 6 days so there is no answer out there that just hasn't made it to me and is delaying treatment.  The doctor and I are both waiting.  Some how, that is a comforting feeling to me.  I'm much more calm about the whole thing the more I learn, something I'm so thankful for.

Still no results!

Here I am, still waiting.  I guess I misunderstood the receptionist yesterday that the results were in and the doctor just hadn't looked at them.  Apparently they weren't there last night and they didn't arrive today, either.  I get to wait the rest of the weekend. . . I burst into tears the minute we hung up.  The waiting is terrible!

There is good news, though.  I've been doing more and more reading about what it seems is going on and of all the things we could be dealing with, this really is a pretty easily dealt with one.  If my levels are high, then I'll have to have other preventative treatments or tests to make sure she isn't being harmed.  Other than that the bulk of the actual treatment will be for Em in the first few weeks after she is born until my antibodies fully exit her blood.  There are treatments available that are fully effective at helping remove the toxins, particularly bilirubin, before they become harmful to her body.  For all of this, I'm very thankful.  A short stay in the NICU is a small price to pay for a healthy baby though.  It seems that modern medicine has taken a big part of the danger out of this condition and that as long as it monitored and managed properly, she will be fine.  This is what I'm hanging on to this weekend when all we can do is wait.

The unexpected

I had to have my labs redrawn Tuesday because they didn't make the transfer with my patient file for some reason.  Some surprising curve-ball results came back and I had to have more blood taken yesterday.  Right now I'm waiting on the doctor to call me back with yesterday's results.  Depending on what the results show, there is a potential of danger for the baby.  I know very little right now other than what they were testing for and a minimal amount that I was able to learn from the internet.  I wasn't able to find much scholarly information on the internet, mostly just stuff from mother/baby forums like Babycenter so any information I do have is only minimally credible.  I hope to have more information soon.  Until then, I'm really kind of freaking out.  Thoughts, good vibes, and prayers are appreciated.

ETA:   I called before they closed today and she told me the doctor hadn't had a chance to look the results yet and that I should hear something either tonight or in the morning. Well the office has been closed a few hours now and I still haven't heard anything.  I guess we'll have to wait for the results until tomorrow.  What is one more night of shoddy sleep? Sigh.

Right now, I know that I have a certain antibody present in my blood but I don't know the titer or concentration (the initial blood work was general and didn't measure the titer but the second round was looking for other antibodies which can present together and the titers of each of them). The results will tell us exactly how serious of a thing we are going to have to deal with.  At this point it could really be inconsequential for this pregnancy but something that would affect subsequent pregnancies or it could be something that might require a stay in the NICU, intensive time under the bili lights, and even a blood transfusion for Em.  So ready to know where on this spectrum we are and to receive some non-internet based information!        

Anticipation!

In many ways, this pregnancy has been easier than my other two successful pregnancies.  That's not to say that there aren't many days that I feel like I can barely walk from hip/sciatic pain or that there aren't nightly bouts of acid reflux but I really do feel like it has been easier this time around.  

Maybe my improved outlook on the aches and pains of pregnancy is because I never thought we'd be expecting a third and after all the heart ache of our previous losses, physical pain is really inconsequential.  I love feeling this little girl kick and move inside of me but I can't restrain myself and hope the weeks continue to pass quickly so I'll get to hold her and see her beautiful face.  

At the same time, however, I hope we get a few extra weeks to work on her room.  It is still pretty much in playroom mode.  We have a bookcase that needs to be completed before we can move out the rest of the boy's stuff out of the playroom/nursery to begin painting.  We hope to get the bookcase finished this upcoming weekend, though it is no small task.  We are covering a 6 ft., 5 shelf bookcase in sheets of poetry, decoupage style.  It had been covered in a plastic faux wood veneer that we peeled off to reveal the wood beneath.  We have a lot of furniture moving to accomplish once that project is finished.  Hopefully by next week, however, we'll be ready to begin painting on the nursery so we can get the crib put together and her room finally looking like a nursery!

Either way, the anticipation is building.  Anticipation to get to hold this little lady and to have our house finally settled with everything finally arranged where we want it.  

Some other highly anticipatory news came from some good friends of ours.  They have been longing to add a child to their family since before we found out we were expecting our oldest.  This week they found out they will be adding TWO to their family later this year!!  They are beyond excited and surprised to be having twins and we are so, so happy for their wonderful family!  

Meeting with the new doctor!

Yesterday we had our first actual meeting with my new doctor.  I say "my new doctor" because now I'm officially a patient!  Chad took off for the appointment time and was able to go with me while the boys stayed at home with my Dad, so we could have the freedom to discuss things and not have the distractions that kiddos naturally bring.

Now for the details:

The Dr. T was very nice and has an excellent manner.  He is equally matched with a wonderful office staff.  I had a very thorough first appointment and I'd say he was probably in with us for the better part of 45 minutes and it may have been an hour.  I don't think I've ever had a doctor spend that much time just discussing things, ever.

He was completely upfront about Trial of Labor (TOL) and the risks and the higher degree of risk that I have having had two previous c-sections.  He was also upfront about my chance of a successful VBA2C and the possibility that even if I do attempt TOL, I still have a chance that I won't have a vaginal delivery which has nothing to do with the risks that are associated but have much more to do that I have not had a successful delivery yet, am short in stature, and we have no way of knowing now other variables such as the baby's size.  He has one of the lowest c-section rate of any doctor in the area at 8%.  The national average is 32%.  For me he estimates that my risk of attempting a TOL and ending in a c-section, is about 20% because of my history.  So that is an 80% chance of success which is still quite high when compared to the national c-section rate.

In addition to explaining the risks and probabilities, he explained his policy on being present for the birth.  Unlike most doctors, he doesn't work with an on-call group and he is solely on-call 24-7 unless he has to be out of town.  If that is the case, the on-call doctor at the hospital will be the one in charge and if that is the case I won't have the opportunity to attempt a TOL.  However, in the last two years (I believe that was the time period) he has only missed the delivery of two of his patients which comes out to a less than 1% chance that he won't be able to make it to the hospital if I go into labor.  Seems to suck for him but is wonderful news if you are the patient!  His wife works alongside him and it seems that they are committed to women's health as a couple and understand the intricacies and insecurities that women have in these most vulnerable and delightful times in their lives.

Chad and I both have mixed feelings about TOL and we honestly have no idea if we will attempt it or not.  The risks, though pretty low, are still significant enough to give us pause.  As the doctor pointed out, we are under no pressure to make the decision now and have about 10 weeks of thought to put in.  There are lots of things that might influence our decision as we near the birth as well.  At this point, we cannot know the size of the baby, if she will drop and engage, how my cervix will prepare, etc.  There are lots of variables that can change the course and make the decision for us.  For now, even being able to make the choice is very empowering for me.  Even if we do end up choosing RCS (repeat c/s).  I didn't remotely have the choice with my previous doctor.  So that's where we are right now.  I'm just happy to have a doctor that is open to it.  

29 years ago today

...my parents got married.  In memory of my mom, I bought Sugar-Free Coconut Cookies for me to drown my sorrows in since alcohol is off limits.  I guess it will do.